'Office Space' and 'Fight Club' Collide…In Real Life
Engineers and tech professionals — listen, we know your jobs sometimes can turn you into unfathomable abysses of pent-up aggression because of stupid people and ridiculous work tasks.

So we understand if you occasionally need to, well, beat the living hell out of one another to let loose and relax a little bit. 'Ya know?

Reports The Associated Press:

Every two weeks, some Silicon Valley techies turn into vicious street brawlers in a real-life, underground fight club. Kicking, punching and swinging every household object imaginable — from frying pans and tennis rackets to pillowcases stuffed with soda cans — they beat each other mercilessly in a garage in this bedroom community south of San Francisco.

Then, bloodied and bruised, they limp back to their desks in the morning.

Gints Klimanis, a 37-year-old software engineer and martial arts instructor, started the invitation-only "Gentlemen's Fight Club" in Menlo Park in 2000 after his no-holds-barred sessions with a training partner grew to more than a dozen people.

"We have to go to work every day," Klimanis said. "We're constantly told to buy things we don't need, and just for a couple hours we have the freedom to do what we want to do."

Most participants are men working in the high-tech industry.

Hey, fellas, we'll figure out that computer problem ourselves. No biggy. Relax. We're on your side.

Top 5 Worst Tech Products of All Time
…via PC World.

5. Sony BMG Music CDs (2005)
…which essentially turned your PC into hackers' little mistress.

4. Microsoft Windows Millennium (2000)
…aka Windows ME, or "Mistake Edition."

3. Syncronys SoftRAM (1995)
Rather than "double" your system memory with $30 piece of software installation, all SoftRAM really did was expand the size of Windows' hard disk cache.

2. RealNetworks RealPlayer (1999)
…a lawsuit-prone media player that…rarely actually plays media files.

1. America Online (1989-2006)
Says PC World: "Awful software, inaccessible dial-up numbers, rapacious marketing, in-your-face advertising, questionable billing practices, inexcusably poor customer service, and enough spam to last a lifetime…"

Golf Shot in Space Is Postponed
Bad news, space and golf fans: the plan for Russian and American astronauts to launch a golf ball into space has been postponed.

Yesterday's mission, the scheduled 65th spacewalk to build and maintain the orbiting International Space Station laboratory, we previously reported (Item 2) was going to include an attempt to whack a golf ball into orbit for the longest drive in history. Yet maintenance tasks left little time for publicity stunts.

Russian officials had cleared Pavel V. Vinogradov, the Russian station commander, to use golf equipment carried to the station on earlier cargo flights to drive a special ball into orbit. The Element 21 Golf Company in Toronto had paid Russia an unspecified amount for the astronaut to smack a special radio-transmitting, gold-plated ball into a three-year orbit of Earth.

The stunt was postponed until later in the year.

Thursday's venture outside the station was unusual in that part of it was managed from mission control in Houston while most of it would be orchestrated by the Russian control center near Moscow.

6 Ways to Beat a Bot
…based on Daniel Wilson's "How to Survive a Robot Uprising" (a previous eBay "Find of the Week" here at the blog), and stripped right from Wired.

1. Hood
To thwart rapidly improving facial-recognition systems, don a hood or a hat — the fabric makes the shape of your head more difficult to identify.

2. Goggles
If a bot zaps you in your eyes with a laser, you're blind. Welder's goggles will protect your most sensitive sensor.

3. Crowbar
Hand-to-hand combat -- not a good idea on a titanium-and-steel killing machine. Arm yourself with a heavy, blunt weapon, like an old-fashioned crowbar.

4. Compass
Knowing how to spot an android is half the battle. Hold a compass next to the suspect. If the bot's magnetic field makes the needle go haywire, bolt.

5. Dirt
Bike Robots have a hard time navigating rough terrain, so consider a bicycle to get you to safety. (Trust nothing with an engine.)

6. Cape
Newer bots can recognize their prey by its walk. A nice long cape or trench coat can disguise your gait.

2006 World Cup Technology
As 32 teams limber up for the start of the 2006 World Cup in Germany next week, the nation has been setting a new standard for sophisticated technology in sporting events. Here are a few examples of recent high-tech updates for match play in the month-long tournament event, which draws the second-largest TV audience in the world after the Olympics.

RFID Tickets
The list of security precautions the German government is taking is substantial. It begins with the use of RFID (radio frequency identification) technology. More than 3.5 million tickets for the 64 matches will be sold with an embedded RFID chip containing identification information that will be checked against a database as fans pass through entrance gates at all 12 stadiums.

Organizers have asked everyone requesting tickets to provide a wealth of personal data, including name, address, DOB, nationality and number of passport/ID card. Never before have fans attending a FIFA-organized event been required to provide so much information about themselves that can be accessed so quickly.

High-Tech Balls
FIFA, football's soccer's professional governing body, has introduced a new ball, the "Teamgeist," which was presented last December by FIFA and Adidas, its manufacturer. The Teamgeist weighs about a pound and is made of 14 polyurethane panels bound together with a thermal process, which makes it much smoother and perfectly round. Yes, all balls are round. But this one is rounder than any other, according to experts at Britain's University of Loughborough, and bless 'em, the Britons know soccer (Though will England let them down again this year? Rooney's almost definitely out. Bah. We digress.).

With fewer panels and no stitching, the Teamgeist is less prone to losing its shape after a kick. That gives the ball better aerodynamics — the rounder the ball, the more balanced its flight — and is supposed to provide the players significantly more control. (FIFA recently decided against embedding a tracking system based on a wireless microchip in the center of the ball. The chip's signal would be picked up by antennae positioned around the field, analyzed by computers, and immediately relayed to a "watch" worn by the referee.) Basically, the new ball won't sag in damp conditions or lose its shape after being kicked around a lot — on average 2,000 times during a regular 90-minute game.

Fast Fingerprinting
Finally, during the games, more than 30,000 federal police officers will be on duty, and some of them will be equipped with mobile "fast identification" fingerprint devices, reports PC World. Fingerprint data captured by the optical devices will also be matched against data stored in the central database of the German Federal Intelligence Service.

Top 10 Strangest Office Gadgets
…via TechEBlog.

10. USB Aroma Therapy
A gadget that plugs into your PC's USB port and can generate three different aromas; you actually choose your scent using your computer.

9. USB Air Darts
USB air darts are powered through any USB port and compatible with PC/Mac systems. You control the aim and firing mechanisms using your mouse. Because the guy in the next cubicle really bugs you.

8. Programmable Soda Cans
A soda bottle with customizable flavor buttons — Ipfini's "Programmable Liquid Container." Each bottle is filled with carbonated sugar water and feature additive buttons on its side (aroma, flavor, color), which allow for up to 32 combinations of soda on the fly.

7. Bacteria Killing LCD Monitor
Two words: "negative ionization."

6. iPod Nano Tie
A tie with an integrated pocket for your iPod Nano, Pink's Commuter Tie is made from 100-percent silk and features an extra fabric loop to hide those unsightly wires. Choose from navy, red and pink colors.

5. Wearable Sleeping Bag

No words necessary.

4. DIY AOL Disc Thrower
Got AOL discs lying around your desk? Use them to build a high-speed LEGO disc thrower. It consists of "two main parts, the head that throws discs, and the tail which feeds the head with compact discs." Because the guy in the next cubicle really, REALLY bugs you.

3. Head Spa Massager
Japanese engineering meets Italian design. This device uses acupressure technology to stimulate blood circulation. Powered by a rechargeable battery, it is good for on-the-go relaxation and "letting go"…if you're not into fight clubs.

2. Blowfly Alarm Clock
Hey! Wake up. Jeez, you're at work, for pity's sake. You need one of these. When the alarm goes off, the little "bowfly" takes off from its launch pad and starts flying around making noises until you catch it.

1. The Mental Typewriter
This brain-to-computer device converts your thoughts into cursor movements on screen; 128 electrodes are placed on your scalp and software then decodes EEG-like signals into usable information. Because this tech is still in its early stages, it takes 5-10 minutes to type out a simple sentence, with electrodes taking about an hour to apply.

Her Smile Remains a Mystery, But Perhaps Not Her Voice
Forget "The Da Vinci Code," the movie and the book…utter tripe. Rather, here's some interesting news regarding Leonardo's famous 16th century portrait Mona Lisa.

Dr. Matsumi Suzuki, a Japanese acoustics expert who generally uses his skills to help with criminal investigations, measured the face and hands of Leonardo da Vinci's Mona Lisa to estimate her height and create a model of her skull.

Once he had that, Suzuki told Reuters, he was able to create what her voice very well might have sounded like.

The chart of any individual's voice, known as a voice print, is unique to that person and Suzuki says he believes he has achieved 90 percent accuracy in recreating the quality of the enigmatic woman's speaking tone.

"In Mona Lisa's case, the lower part of her face is quite wide and her chin is pointed," Suzuki explained. "The extra volume means a relatively low voice, while the pointed chin adds mid-pitch tones," he added. The scientists brought in an Italian woman to add the necessary intonation to the voice.

"I am the Mona Lisa. My true identity is shrouded in mystery," the portrait proclaims at this Web site.

Finally…

Top 10 Worst Stupid Engineering Mistakes
…ripped straight from Wired:

10. R101 airship, 1930
Seven years before the Hindenburg disaster, the British thought 5.5 million cubic feet of hydrogen in a bubble of fabric would make for a fun way to get around. On her maiden flight, the airship's cover was blown open by wind, and from there it was oh-the-humanity city.

9. Citigroup Center, 1978
Last-minute changes to structural braces of this Manhattan tower left it vulnerable to collapse in high winds. With a hurricane bearing down on the city, builders rushed to strengthen it by welding 2-inch steel plates over 200 weakly bolted joints.

8. Skylab, 1973
America's first space station was hopelessly damaged at launch because designers failed to account for the aerodynamics of the meteoroid shield and solar panels. When crews weren't busy making repairs, they complained of the extreme heat on board.

7. Purity Distilling Company tank, 1919
You gotta keep your molasses somewhere – how about a rickety tank 50 feet tall and 90 feet in diameter in the middle of Boston? The structure was painted brown to hide the leaks. Eventually it burst (possibly exploding from fermentation), sending waves of molasses up to 15 feet high into the city and killing 21.

6. Firestone 500 tires, 1970s
These steel-belted radials allowed water to seep under the tread, which caused the belting to rust and the tread to separate, typically at high speeds. Dozens of deaths later, Firestone blamed consumers, then recalled 10 million tires.

5. McDonnell Douglas DC-10, 1970s
Nearly a thousand people around the world lost their lives while the kinks were being ironed out of this 290-ton competitor to Boeing's 747. Blown-out cargo doors, shredded hydraulic lines, and engines dropped midflight were just a few of the behemoth's early problems.

4. Northeastern US power grid, 1965
A single protective relay tripped in Ontario, overloading nearby circuits and causing a cascade of outages that left 30 million homes without power for up to 13 hours. A fragile, redundancy-free design ensured that it would happen eventually. After decades of repairs and upgrades, it happened again in 2003.

3. Vasa, 1628
Three hundred years before the Titanic, the Vasa was the biggest sailing vessel of its day. The overloaded ship ruled the seas for all of a mile before she took on water through her too-low gun ports and promptly capsized.

2. Kansas City Hyatt walkways, 1981
Walkways crisscrossing the hotel's multistory atrium collapsed, domino-style, raining debris and hundreds of people onto the packed dance contest below. The cause: grossly negligent design and use of beams that could support only 30 percent of the load.

1. St. Francis Dam, 1928
Self-taught engineer William Mulholland built this LA dam on a defective foundation and ignored the geology of the surrounding canyon. He also dismissed cracks that formed as soon as the reservoir behind it was filled. Five days later, it ruptured, killing 450 people and destroying entire towns (along with Mulholland's career).


Cheers.