This News Rack Will Self-Destruct in 10 Seconds. (But if it Doesn't, Police Will Blow it Up.)
Imagine, if you will, walking by a news rack, stopping to purchase some daily print news, and hearing the theme to "Mission: Impossible" play as you drop the coinage and open the news rack window. What would you do?

Obviously, you would call the police and report a bomb.

So last Friday, a newspaper promotion for the movie "Mission: Impossible III" misfired when a Los Angeles County sheriff's arson squad blew up a news rack under the presumption that the rack contained a bomb.

The L.A. Times coin machine held a digital musical device designed to play the famed TV-turned-movie series' theme song when the rack's door was opened.

Several newspaper buyers reported that they thought the music and wiry box inside the news rack was a bomb. Which must have seemed like an obvious conclusion at the time. Not really.

Tired of Hearing 'No'? Coffee Should Increase Numbr of 'Yes' Responses.
According to recent research, if you want to bring someone around to your way of thinking, you should make sure he or she first has some caffeine, because "caffeine makes us more open to persuasion."

The Australian researchers say that a caffeine hit improves our ability to process information and increases the extent to which we listen to and take on board a persuasive message.

We suggest that if you intend on asking your boss for a raise, first buy him or her one of those Big Gulp-type-size coffees from 7-11 and maybe an espresso or six. Then happy persuading!

Public Service Announcement (PSA): Look Before You Sit!
The same weekend as the above, ahem, "bomb squad scare," police were reported as being on the lookout for an unknown bandit who has been putting glue on toilet seats at businesses across the state of Maryland.

The first incident was reported last weekend at Wal-Mart, where an employee found a 20-year-old man stuck to the seat and banging on a wall for help.

The other victim was glued to the toilet at a local Denny's, on April Fool's Day.

We implore you: Please look before you sit.

Virus-Fueled Batteries
An MIT materials scientist and her team are promoting the replication of viruses — and harnessing them to create high-performance devices for practical applications.

Dr. Angela Belcher and her team have successfully created a battery assembled by a benign biological virus that binds to gold and cobalt oxide. The newly created battery material has three times the electricity-generating capacity of traditional battery materials of the same size.

Simply put, genetically manipulated viruses could someday replace standard lithium-ion batteries, reports Discovery News, "packing two to three times more energy than other batteries."

The invention, falling within the field of nanotechnology, is an advance in the emerging science of using biological methods to create new materials. The team's work was described in a paper in Science magazine last week.

China Successfully Tests Home-Made Levitation Train
China has successfully tested a locally made magnetic levitation train, the first time the country has achieved the feat without using foreign technology, state media reported Monday (here via AP).

On Sunday, the 20-ton test maglev train ran steadily on a 1,400-ft. experimental line in the provincial capital of Chengdu, the official Xinhua News Agency said Monday. It can hold 60 people and travel up to 100 mph, Xinhua cited Zhang Kunlun, deputy director of the School of Electrical Engineering at the Southwest Jiaotong University in Chengdu, as having said.

The maglev train was developed by a research team at the university, one of China's key engineering schools. The technology uses powerful magnets to suspend a train above a track and propel it at high speeds.

Why We Love BBC News, Pt. I
A crocodile in northern Australia chased a storm-clearance worker up a tree and made off with his chainsaw, BBC reported last Friday. The worker was clearing a tree that fell on the crocodile enclosure at the Corroboree Park Tavern, 50 miles east of the northern city of Darwin.

The 14.5-foot croc, called "Brutus," jumped from the water and sped 20 ft. to the tree, chewed on the chainsaw for 90 minutes, and thus reduced it to pieces. "It was still going and he took the chainsaw onto the ground and proceeded to smash it and it stalled," said Peter Shappert, the tavern's owner. "The crocodile didn't cut himself, just broke a few teeth."

The saw was destroyed.

OK, so recap of key points here: 1) a speedy, 14.5-foot saltwater crocodile, 2) called Brutus, 3) with a chainsaw.

The script basically writes itself.

Why We Love BBC News, Pt. II
A South Korean bee farmer covered his body with nearly 200,000 bees in protest over a territorial dispute between South Korea and Japan, BBC reported on Tuesday.

Ahn Sang-gyu, known for his bee performances, was protesting against Japan's claim to a number of rocky islets located in waters between the two countries.

He had tears running down his face as he was stung 200 times.

Here is a retirement savings financial calculator that computes how much you would need to have invested in order to withdraw a specified amount each year over the course of a specified period of time. Simply, it calculates exactly how much you want to make per month when you retire and how much you'll need to have stockpiled.

Evolution of Laughter Traced to Falling Down
Evolutionary biologists have traced the origins of laughter back 4 million years to "pre-humans slipping and stumbling in their first faltering attempts to walk on two legs," reports The Sunday Times.

Of course.

According to the theory, when these pre-humans saw a member of their group lose his footing, they would laugh as a sign to each other that "something was amiss, but nothing too serious."

"Becoming bipedal means there was a greater chance of tripping and falling. Essentially, the suggestion is that slapstick and humour [sic.] evolved from that time," said Matthew Gervais, an American evolutionary biologist who led the study.

The theory, then, says The Times, could explain why even today "the ungainly walk" — such as John Cleese's "Ministry of Silly Walks" — remains a staple element of slapstick humor.

Meanwhile, on the West Coast United States…
L.A. still counts as the U.S., right? Hollywood and Scientology haven't created their own country yet, right?

Anyhow, meanwhile in L.A. — … — actually, this blogger only presumes the subject of this news item lives in L.A…she seems just about a perfect fit for it. But this blogged news item really doesn't warrant any sort of, like, background research, at all.

So, meanwhile, presumably in L.A., pop singer/mother/role model Britney Spears may — may — be continuing to breed, and this time possibly a baby version of herself (a girl), report a lot of silly online news sources.

Reps for the star haven't confirmed or denied the new pregnancy reports.

Really, we're not sure why we even published this item — except maybe for the fact that she already hatched one "baby," rumors circulate that she may be hatching another, and yet our government still doesn't step in to do anything about this!

Science Headline of the Week: Wildlife poop is scientist's treasure

Two-Legged Robot is Fastest Yet
Using a program that mimics the way human neurons control reflexes, a robot has achieved the fastest gait yet of a two-legged machine, reports Discovery News.

The biologically inspired computer models not only give the so-called RunBot a stable gait, but also reinforce its learning to achieve faster speeds.

Although the 9-in. tall machine can't run yet, it is able to speed up from "a slow lumber to a fast clip" in less than three minutes and achieve a gait comparable to the fastest relative speed of a person walking.

Cheers.